Memories of Eddy

My “Eddy” stories might fill a book…our encounters have been that memorable. Eddy was my brother-in-law but he was also my friend.

In one of those funny coincidences that happen so often during life, Wendy and I met Eddy at exactly the same point in time… at my wedding to Eddy’s good friend Joe Valdez. To the Valdez boys, Joe and Jim, Eddy was more than a friend, he was another brother and I was so pleased, when a year later, Eddy married into the Kiser family. We always considered ourselves so lucky that two sisters had married two brothers; the family bond was already that much deeper. Many of the Eddy stories had taken place before Wendy and I entered into Eddy’s life but those stories have become part of our family lore.

Joe and Eddy had had a number of adventures together in their college days but I think that the times they spent camping and adventuring outdoors were the memories that formed a lasting bond between them. Somehow, two young men with completely different backgrounds came together in a shared appreciation of the wonders of Mother Nature. Joe is a hunter. Eddy was a naturalist. Together they shared a deep curiosity about the workings of the natural world and I think that each brought an understanding and perspective on nature to the other. Certainly, they did not always agree on the way that humans should interact with this natural world. It was more of a philosophical “meeting in the middle.”

Joe always liked to tell me that Eddy had once saved his life. This story took place high in the Sierras when Joe and Eddy were backpacking. It must have been springtime because there was still some snow on the ground and the rivers were running full and fast. Eddy had already crossed one particular river and Joe had started across the slick log “bridge” after him when he lost his footing and went into the water. Unfortunately, Joe was at risk of drowning as the heavy pack strapped to his back threatened to pull him underwater. Acting quickly, and at risk to himself, Eddy was able to cut the backpack straps so that Joe could gain a foothold and clamber out of the freezing water. They had survived an Outward Bound class together in Colorado but this event sealed their fates…they became brothers for life. It seems so appropriate now that Joe and Eddy spent their last visit together in September on a drive up through the Sierras to Tioga Pass. Just the guys again on another road trip into the wild.

My first camping experience with Eddy came shortly after I married Joe. Wendy and Ed were just falling in love. All together, but driving two pick up trucks, we set out for Arizona and the Grand Canyon. I remember that it must have been just after Thanksgiving or perhaps Christmas because Wendy had cooked a turkey before the trip. She had then packed cold, leftover turkey sandwiches made on Wonder White bread for the drive. Joe and I were so tickled to observe that “whole grain” Eddy took such delight in those sandwiches that Wendy had made for him!

We had a funny little incident occur on this road trip when Eddy’s truck had a temper tantrum and stopped running. Wendy and I sat in Joe’s truck (perhaps munching on a Wonder White turkey sandwich) while the guys went to work on the impaired truck engine. A few minutes later, their heads emerged from under the hood, and they started waving their arms and hopping up and down, whooping in a Native American style dance of victory and thankfulness. The truck was running again. Wendy and I just looked at each other and laughed…”goofy guys”…yep, these were the men for us!

The Grand Canyon was cold, cold, cold. There was snow on the ground and we slept in the back of the trucks. I remember waking up and seeing icicles on the roof of the truck shell that had formed from the condensation of our breath! It was in this campground that Eddy found a poem written about “The White Buffalo Woman.” A Native American story…he interpreted this to be a sign. Wendy was his White Buffalo Woman. Personally, I thought that the Wonder Bread had gone to his head…his White Buffalo Woman was camping with a butane curling iron!

Over the next few years, we camped together several times. Our daughters grew up together and Eddy always made it a point to make sure that all the girls had books about rocks and snakes and other desert creatures. Every outing was a geology or weather lesson. While other adults might be busy “being busy” about the camp, Eddy could be found sharing the wonders of a bug’s life with the children or what the various cloud formations might portend. This man who took such an interest in kids, rocks, birds, plants, bees and clouds, always amused my daughters. And, they were especially amazed at what a great beard he could grow! It was like having John Muir as one’s very own uncle.

The longer I knew Eddy, the more he reminded me of my Grandpa Carpenter; never rushed and always kind-hearted and soft-spoken. He even dressed a bit like grandpa…rumpled pants, a favorite shirt that was fraying apart or missing buttons, and a funny assortment of hats. And then, there was Eddy’s penchant for collecting things and saving all sorts of items that might come in handy one day. After grandpa passed away, our family all felt that Eddy continued to “channel” him in the mortal world! I also liked to imagine that Eddy was the kind of man my Uncle Tommy might have matured into had he not died so young in the Peace Corps. Grandma and Grandpa had had similar feelings about Eddy, and being desert rats themselves, formed a special bond with Wendy’s husband.

As time passed and Eddy’s tumor began to affect his energy and health, we all began to notice what Eddy had seen long ago. Wendy had become his White Buffalo Woman. For five years, we have all observed her amazing strength fueled by her love for Eddy to care for him and keep their family together at home through all sorts of adversity. When he could no longer drive the camper to take his family out into the wilderness she took over. She made sure that his dream to camp around the Western United States with his daughters materialized. Through seizures, medications, and profound fatigue, Wendy made sure that her family had the sort of experiences together that would make a full life for Eddy and a lifetime of memories for his girls.

What a journey it has been: Sad and funny, awful and wonderful, mundane and awesome. These are just a few of my many Eddy stories, the rest to be taken out and shared over and over again in the coming years when we see or think of something that reminds us of him. And always, I will hear Eddy’s very distinctive laugh in my memory…he loved his family and he loved a good story.

Debby Kiser Valdez